Welcome to the Big Sexy Chat Podcast Starring Merf & Chrystal | BigSexyChatPod@gmail.com
Sex, Health, and Fatness: A Look Back at 2024’s Biggest Moments
Sex, Health, and Fatness: A Look Back at 2024’s Biggest Mom…
Send us a text This episode reflects on the significant milestones and conversations that shaped the fat community in 2024. From exploring …
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Jan. 9, 2025

Sex, Health, and Fatness: A Look Back at 2024’s Biggest Moments

Sex, Health, and Fatness: A Look Back at 2024’s Biggest Moments

Send us a text

This episode reflects on the significant milestones and conversations that shaped the fat community in 2024. From exploring the impact of sexual wellness products to discussing the complexities of dating and health, we take a look back at the triumphs and trials that defined our year.

• Recap of the year and its highlights 
• Exploration of sexual wellness and enjoyment 
• Personal stories about dating in the digital age 
• Conversations surrounding menopause and health awareness 
• Celebration of Tigress’ Time Magazine feature 
• Discussion on medical anti-fatness and healthcare biases 
• Insight into polyamory and kink communities 
• Reflection on the "Your Fat Friend" documentary and its resonance 
• Hopes and goals for the coming year, focusing on inclusivity and representation

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Chapters

00:37 - Year in Review

06:51 - Exploring Diverse Topics in Current Culture

16:11 - Exploring Fat-Friendly Kink and Advocacy

22:54 - Focusing on Fat Liberation and Advocacy

32:55 - Fat-Friendly Fashion and Inclusivity

39:44 - Exploring Body Positivity and Self-Exploration

47:28 - Embracing Greed for Sexual Liberation

Transcript
WEBVTT

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Hi, welcome to Big Sexy Chat.

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I'm Crystal, I'm Murph.

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We're just two rad fatties sitting around chewing the fat.

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Twice a month.

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We'll be chatting about current events, hot topics, sex, sex toys, fat politics, fat community, cannabis, cbd, you name it.

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We're going to talk about it.

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We are very excited to have you a part of our community.

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Welcome and enjoy.

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Hey there, welcome back to Big Sexy Chat.

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My name is Crystal and I'm here with my beautiful co-host, murph.

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Hi, murph, hi, welcome back to everybody.

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We're so excited about today's episode.

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We're going to do a year in review, just like you've seen People Magazine every year, right, or Time Magazine a year in review.

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So we're going to review some of our famous and favorite episodes of our podcast from 2024.

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And we're going to talk about some really exciting, cool things that were happening in the phatosphere in 2024.

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So, murph, do you want to get us started?

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Yeah, so let's talk a little bit about the episodes that we recorded this year.

00:01:01.423 --> 00:01:25.070
Sure, you know, I think we started the year off really strong when we got those vibrators from WeVibe and Womanizer, because I think of how much that Womanizer Premium 2 duo has changed my life, and that was the start of January, january, like we.

00:01:25.070 --> 00:01:34.722
We jumped into it, we did fat con, we got back, we had that episode and ever since, like man, oh man, all I can say is like womanizer.

00:01:34.722 --> 00:01:44.506
Please, please, please, please, please, make the longer handle, because, oh my gosh, like talk about epic life changing.

00:01:44.506 --> 00:01:57.310
Well, the good news isph, that Kim Card has sent us some more goodies and they just arrived here today and I'm going to ship them off to you in Ashley tomorrow and you're going to have some more goodies that should rock your 2025.

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They look really amazing and they have a new cream that Kim says feels like little champagne bubbles on your clitoris.

00:02:03.227 --> 00:02:07.152
So, hello, oh my goodness, I know.

00:02:07.152 --> 00:02:13.342
So we get 2025 started off, right, right, and now I'm looking forward to ringing in the new year.

00:02:13.342 --> 00:02:20.234
Yeah, just as long as we can get to the January 20th, yes, yes, but yeah, that was a great episode.

00:02:20.234 --> 00:02:25.721
It wasn't really, you're right, it was really.

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For me, it was also very epic and, um, I just I love their products.

00:02:27.287 --> 00:02:34.772
They make such great products and they're such good quality and they last forever and they're they're made with body safe materials all the things that a girl could ask for.

00:02:34.772 --> 00:02:36.786
Right, and great customer service.

00:02:36.786 --> 00:02:39.615
One of my friends was telling me that, um, they purchased one.

00:02:39.615 --> 00:02:43.286
I don't, it wasn't the womanizer, it was some other thingVibe.

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And she wrote them and was like I really don't, I'm not enjoying this toy.

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And they were like, keep it, here's your full refund.

00:02:49.645 --> 00:02:51.766
And I was just like what?

00:02:51.766 --> 00:03:04.933
Wow, yeah, I've heard nothing but those kinds of stories of like good customer service, spotlight to WeVibe and Womanizer because, yeah, they make some fantastic quality stuff.

00:03:07.039 --> 00:03:08.649
It's the biggest bummer when you spend 200 dollars on a sex store.

00:03:08.649 --> 00:03:10.217
I know you know this mirth and that you're disappointed by it.

00:03:10.217 --> 00:03:12.768
You're like god dang it, wish I could just try these first.

00:03:12.768 --> 00:03:14.513
Right, exactly.

00:03:14.513 --> 00:03:16.500
And there's just, it's not the same.

00:03:16.500 --> 00:03:20.330
When you're standing at the store and it's vibrating in your hand, it's just not the same.

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No, I know, I agree, we jumped into uh dating, into dating with Victoria Nachos and learned a lot about that culture right now, and that's not something you and I really experience.

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And so, learning about the dating apps and what happens in that realm, it just seems so different from when I experienced dating a long time ago, was?

00:03:44.090 --> 00:03:45.840
It was a good conversation.

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I like her motto if you're not gonna lick my pussy, bye, right, it's me first.

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That's what my rule anyway is me than you and me again, but I think she's got.

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She's got because you know, I mean, I know, as a heterosexual woman mostly, you know, I know, um, it's definitely, if I, if I counted the score, it would be like 1 million to 500.

00:04:08.062 --> 00:04:24.492
As far as giving oral sex and receiving it, um, yeah, I mean, we all know it's rare, especially if you're on a date and you're not, like in a committed relationship men, as in general, they don't, they don't do that on the first date, but they want us to, of course.

00:04:24.492 --> 00:04:29.187
Well, yeah, the deficit there is one million to 500.

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Is that right?

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Really, yeah.

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And then, speaking of other things that women have to endure, we talked about perimenopause and menopause with carolyn wadkins.

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That was great.

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Yeah, that was.

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That was a very unifying conversation.

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Sure, yeah, I know you and I both have lots to say about this.

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We were just going off on menopause and perimenopause just now and all the brain fog and all that stuff that goes along with it.

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Nobody tells you about Right, and just the constant feeling of like am I going crazy?

00:05:02.192 --> 00:05:04.269
And I think about that little TikTok thing where it's like.

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Am I going crazy?

00:05:04.711 --> 00:05:09.288
Like I just, and I think about that, that little TikTok thing where it's like, am I the villain, you know?

00:05:09.288 --> 00:05:18.144
Like, because you get so irritated and all the symptoms and all the things, and it's like you're kind of like, am I gaslighting myself, like, does this really happen and exist?

00:05:18.144 --> 00:05:20.610
It was nice to have a conversation where that was normalized.

00:05:20.610 --> 00:05:22.362
Am I the asshole on Reddit?

00:05:22.362 --> 00:05:24.487
But, like, am I the asshole?

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Am I the menopause asshole?

00:05:26.632 --> 00:05:31.144
Because, boy, sometimes I could definitely be an asshole.

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I learned that for white women typically perimenopause lasts about five years.

00:05:37.682 --> 00:05:41.863
Hispanic women usually last about six and a half years and for black women it's about 10 years.

00:05:41.863 --> 00:05:45.721
And I, my paramen pause did last a lot longer than that.

00:05:45.721 --> 00:05:46.644
But I'm also special.

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I'm very uh, I'm high maintenance, I guess.

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I don't know, I'm a little bit of anomaly, I'm I'm overachiever, but um, I know it's really there's.

00:05:54.990 --> 00:05:56.944
I don't know what the difference is, why it's so much.

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I'm sure it's access to, you know, health, good health care, equitable health care, probably a big part of it.

00:06:03.605 --> 00:06:07.043
Um, that'd be my guess, don't you think something like that?

00:06:07.043 --> 00:06:17.750
Oh, I'm sure, I'm sure, and you know, just, environmental access, just, yeah, there's so many, I'm sure, really complex elements to it, but, yeah, that's wild.

00:06:18.271 --> 00:06:27.934
After my uh hysterectomy, which was kind of urgently created, I was on no hormones for four years and I just recently started the patch, the estrogen patch, estradiol.

00:06:27.934 --> 00:06:30.927
Yeah, so far it's pretty good, nice.

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It's not fixing my or helping my brain fog, that's why I wanted to start it, but, yeah, good times.

00:06:35.745 --> 00:06:40.420
Anyway, any other episodes that you were just like so crazy about this year, oh, my goodness.

00:06:40.461 --> 00:06:51.346
So we talked to the Fat and and fucked podcast with dr dr sexy fat and suzy hooker and we had them on just our most recent episode, the round table.

00:06:51.346 --> 00:06:58.151
Um, and that was a fun opportunity to be with other podcasters and talk and um.

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We talked about inclusive movement with wendy and her story of you know kind of of dealing with all the things that come with the exercise lifestyle and how it can really impact fat liberationists.

00:07:14.497 --> 00:07:17.105
So that was a really interesting conversation I felt.

00:07:17.105 --> 00:07:19.851
Murph, have you ever been exercising somewhere and somebody goes?

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You go, girl, good job.

00:07:21.822 --> 00:07:27.334
Yeah, so condescending, and I really think that they don't understand that.

00:07:27.334 --> 00:07:44.232
But yeah, so condescending, which was nice to hear, like the stuff that she does and the Zoom sessions that she has, so it's like I can get movement and I don't have to be in a gym, because anytime you're in a spectacle of space, it's like OK, here we go.

00:07:45.860 --> 00:08:00.615
Tigress was in Time magazine and we talked to her which was incredible and learned all about how she entered into that realm and the things that are starting to change and the publicity that NAFA is getting.

00:08:00.615 --> 00:08:01.697
That was really cool.

00:08:01.697 --> 00:08:03.283
Yeah, that's first on my list.

00:08:03.283 --> 00:08:10.521
For all the things that happened in the Thadosphere this year, to me the most meaningful one was Tigress in Time Magazine.

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There's a lot of really meaningful things, but first of all, tigress is a longtime friend of mine and so I'm just amazed by her all the time and I'm very proud of her.

00:08:18.704 --> 00:08:27.552
But I'm also very hopeful about the work that they do and I'm also grateful for all the work that NAFA does and Tigress is just an amazing ambassador for all of that.

00:08:27.552 --> 00:08:31.776
She's an entire magazine Holy shit, right, fat activist.

00:08:32.760 --> 00:08:40.621
It's incredible In a space talking about health like that opened so many doors, like it's just.

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It's really awe-inspiring.

00:08:42.668 --> 00:08:58.535
Yeah, fat people can be healthy and lots of thin people are unhealthy, y'all Right, I hope I'm not telling you anything new, because you should know that if you're fat, but also if you're not fat, you should know that, especially if you're not fat, because don't just look at me and assume that I have whatever you think I have.

00:08:58.535 --> 00:09:12.905
You don't know, so don't make an assumption, and I don't make an assumption about you, but I do notice that think you've are allowed to just eat whatever they want in public, on public spaces, on social media, and smoke all they want in public spaces, and nobody seems to mind.

00:09:12.905 --> 00:09:15.769
But we don't know if they're healthy or not healthy.

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These are air quotes around the word healthy.

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What does that even mean?

00:09:18.860 --> 00:09:20.022
Exactly, people that you know have that mentality.

00:09:20.022 --> 00:09:22.865
You, exactly People that you know have that mentality.

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You get somebody in a space that says something totally different from that and has all the things to back it up.

00:09:28.130 --> 00:09:32.535
Which Tigress does you got a whole different scenario playing out.

00:09:32.535 --> 00:09:41.052
100%.

00:09:41.052 --> 00:09:46.179
I, if you're gonna go and you know, want to know something interesting about squirting in general.

00:09:46.179 --> 00:09:50.567
Oh, my goodness, she has just got the best stories.

00:09:51.688 --> 00:09:56.023
Yeah, female ejaculation is really um, it's still a taboo topic.

00:09:56.023 --> 00:09:58.028
I guess some people just aren't comfortable talking about it.

00:09:58.028 --> 00:10:01.912
But you know, kim, like me, I'm just like whatever it's humans.

00:10:01.912 --> 00:10:04.503
If you're, as long as you're leaving kids and animals out of I don't care what you do.

00:10:04.503 --> 00:10:06.350
I really don't, as long as everybody has consent.

00:10:06.350 --> 00:10:08.303
But Kim's just like that too.

00:10:08.303 --> 00:10:13.745
She's just like here's how it works, here's how it works for me, here's what I've done, how I've done it and here's how you might also accomplish.

00:10:13.745 --> 00:10:14.708
That's amazing.

00:10:14.708 --> 00:10:30.827
I love her clit and all the things around it and all the elements to how we you know how we interact with the world at large when it comes to the clitoris.

00:10:30.827 --> 00:10:35.907
So that was cool, asher Lee and I cause you had your surgery this year.

00:10:36.419 --> 00:10:47.090
Asher Lee and I talked about polyamory, which was really interesting, um, and you know, got to hear her perspective on things and some of the rules and the vocabulary that comes with that.

00:10:47.090 --> 00:10:54.904
And Another episode that Asherlee participated in when you were out was she brought her doctor, dr Robert.

00:10:54.904 --> 00:10:58.488
That was a really interesting element, I think.

00:10:58.488 --> 00:11:16.981
To have a medical doctor talking about anti-fatness and how they address it and what they experience and getting that validation was really nice, was really nice.

00:11:16.981 --> 00:11:17.804
Having a doctor on our side is wow.

00:11:17.804 --> 00:11:19.312
It's very meaningful and it's like the work that Reagan does, right?

00:11:19.312 --> 00:11:27.673
Reagan Chastain, she's out there at UC Irvine, all kinds of different places in medical schools talking about medical anti-fatness, and same with Ashley's doctor.

00:11:27.673 --> 00:11:50.591
That was a great episode and I'm so grateful for all the work that he's doing.

00:11:50.591 --> 00:11:54.634
And you know they're both educating other people in the world of Times.

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Yesterday that said, approximately 30% of Americans are practicing some version of polyamory.

00:11:59.996 --> 00:12:03.625
Oh, interesting, yeah, it's very interesting.

00:12:03.625 --> 00:12:25.785
Yeah, I know that we live in California so we probably see that a lot more than most people, right, but it's really common here, really really common, and people can make it define it any way they want to.

00:12:25.785 --> 00:12:28.826
Right, it's very malleable and it can change constantly.

00:12:28.826 --> 00:12:32.249
People are doing all kinds.

00:12:32.249 --> 00:12:36.191
There's no more or very little of just male, female, just the to be monogamous.

00:12:36.191 --> 00:12:45.995
But and we've kind of forced ourselves into do that with religion and all that but very interesting, given the cost of living and everything.

00:12:46.054 --> 00:12:50.836
Now, like people are recognizing like I can't, we can't do this as two people, this costs too much.

00:12:50.836 --> 00:12:56.399
Like we need other people in our lives that like are going to help raise our kids and it takes a village.

00:12:56.399 --> 00:13:04.347
And, like you know, we're kind of starting to recognize that the environment we've created really does mean that you should have multiple partners to be able to survive in it.

00:13:04.347 --> 00:13:10.043
It's kind of like I'm going to create my own little community and you know we're all going to take care of each other.

00:13:10.043 --> 00:13:16.894
And I love makes sense to me, like big love on hbo when he built that compound for all of his wives and him yeah, loved it.

00:13:16.894 --> 00:13:17.313
Yeah.

00:13:17.313 --> 00:13:18.961
If it wasn't just about him, yeah, definitely.

00:13:18.961 --> 00:13:21.589
I know it was just a really good show, though it was great.

00:13:21.589 --> 00:13:22.880
Yeah, and I love him so much.

00:13:22.880 --> 00:13:23.783
I'm so sorry he's gone.

00:13:24.265 --> 00:13:27.758
I know, yeah, polyamory is very and enm is very common people.

00:13:27.758 --> 00:13:30.363
I think the more people that learn about it, the more people want to try it.

00:13:30.363 --> 00:13:38.676
And also, when all these mores and these like rules around our marriages and stuff were created by these people that are Christian.

00:13:38.676 --> 00:13:43.970
We didn't live to be 100 back then, so life's a lot different now.

00:13:43.970 --> 00:13:45.561
People live to be in their 90s.

00:13:46.022 --> 00:13:49.571
How are you supposed to have the same partner for, I don't know, 70 years?

00:13:49.571 --> 00:13:51.846
That seems wild to me, right?

00:13:51.846 --> 00:13:59.469
If you're not like growing and changing together and adding other elements, it's really really rough, yeah, and boring, yeah.

00:13:59.469 --> 00:14:01.232
Well, that's tedious.

00:14:01.232 --> 00:14:02.221
Let's just say tedious.

00:14:02.221 --> 00:14:18.109
I mean, exactly what I've noticed in my all my years is that what people couples, whatever their genders are you start to learn each other's buttons, so to speak, and then you kind of get into this routine Like I do A, b, c, d and I know that's always going to make him or her finish.

00:14:18.109 --> 00:14:22.368
But then that gets like, okay, cool, it all works, it works, it works.

00:14:22.368 --> 00:14:25.643
But then it gets kind of dull and it's hard to shake.

00:14:25.643 --> 00:14:35.779
Get yourself out of your little, whatever your little rules are, whatever your little routine is, and it's really hard to get people out of their routines or whatever your little routine is, and it's really hard to get people out of their routines.

00:14:35.779 --> 00:14:43.030
And that's what happens when you have a new person is can bring some new routines and bring some freshness and bring some excitement to the table, absolutely, yeah.

00:14:43.221 --> 00:14:50.168
And speaking of newness and excitement to the table, we talked about Shabari, rope bondage with Beck.

00:14:50.168 --> 00:14:50.809
Yeah, with Beck.

00:14:50.809 --> 00:14:57.493
They're great, yeah, lots of really cool, interesting, really technical information from them.

00:14:57.493 --> 00:14:59.404
It was an exciting episode.

00:14:59.404 --> 00:15:01.650
Yeah, that was really great, great, I love it.

00:15:01.650 --> 00:15:03.330
I love their Instagram.

00:15:03.330 --> 00:15:04.639
It's amazing, yeah.

00:15:04.639 --> 00:15:09.129
And a lot of the great examples of fat bodies being tied up in shawari.

00:15:09.129 --> 00:15:10.812
It's incredible.

00:15:10.812 --> 00:15:13.369
What's it called when they're hanging?

00:15:13.369 --> 00:15:18.621
I always forget this word suspension.

00:15:18.621 --> 00:15:24.532
Suspension, amazing, right, yeah, oh yeah, it just looks incredible.

00:15:24.532 --> 00:15:33.109
It really just it's such a beautiful, artistic but very like sexually arousing experience.

00:15:33.109 --> 00:15:35.913
We bought some stuff to try out.

00:15:35.913 --> 00:15:38.181
I'm excited to give it a go.

00:15:38.942 --> 00:15:42.880
I always assumed that suspension was not for fat bodies, because I think I mentioned this in the episode.

00:15:42.880 --> 00:15:49.582
When I think of one or two ropes digging into my fat, I think that my weight and gravity is going to make that hurt really bad.

00:15:49.582 --> 00:16:05.625
But Beck was saying that they distribute the weight by making the ties wider, so instead of having two ropes, you might have 10 ropes and that kind of distributes the way that the gravity is pulling you down.

00:16:05.625 --> 00:16:07.711
It hurts less or maybe not at all.

00:16:07.711 --> 00:16:18.855
Yeah, yeah, I've been talking to a friend who is really into BDSM and hearing about some of the ways that they use furniture and things like that.

00:16:18.855 --> 00:16:24.633
It's specifically meant to like alleviate the pain that you'd have in your lower back or do these types of things.

00:16:24.633 --> 00:16:34.735
So it's nice to see that there are so many accommodations for fat bodies to explore really new, unique aspects of, you know, sexual health and adventure.

00:16:34.735 --> 00:16:37.330
But we don't talk about those things.

00:16:37.330 --> 00:16:40.222
So, like, getting more information about this is really helpful.

00:16:41.066 --> 00:16:56.513
And I want to add this and I've tried, I've added this a few times to our different episodes, but the kink community can be very body accepting and when I had my boutique and I had clients come in, you know, who were nervous about buying lingerie or whatever and they wanted to date, but they didn't know where to date.

00:16:56.513 --> 00:17:05.152
And I would say, if you have any interest at all in that little bit of kink, maybe, just, you know, dip your toes in the water, because kinky people are into people who are also into their kink.

00:17:05.152 --> 00:17:09.570
They don't really, they're not so focused on you need to be size 12 or whatever.

00:17:09.570 --> 00:17:18.061
You need to lose 10 more pounds.

00:17:18.061 --> 00:17:19.867
They're just like, oh, you're into the same kink, you into foot fetishes, so am I?

00:17:19.867 --> 00:17:21.070
I'm into leather, you, so you, that's all they care about.

00:17:21.070 --> 00:17:22.375
Yeah, no, not 100, but let's say like 95.

00:17:22.375 --> 00:17:24.078
Yeah, a large portion, because it's about the act of whatever it is.

00:17:24.078 --> 00:17:30.880
It's not about like, oh, you need to, you know, meet some sort of ideal before I'm really into whatever it is.

00:17:30.880 --> 00:17:31.721
Yeah, precisely.

00:17:31.781 --> 00:17:46.132
And the kink community is open to nerds and to people that are neurodivergent and eccentric and all those things that make up wonderful humans, and they're also very accepting of the way you express your sexuality or your gender.

00:17:46.132 --> 00:17:50.324
It's just a cool community and it's really good.

00:17:50.324 --> 00:17:55.608
If you're nervous about it and you're a fat person, it's an interesting community to get involved in.

00:17:55.608 --> 00:17:57.124
But I just want to warn people too.

00:17:57.124 --> 00:18:04.172
There's a lot of fakes in the kink world Like I'm a dom, these men oftentimes who say they're doms but they're really not.

00:18:04.172 --> 00:18:07.269
So make sure you learn more about what that means to be a dom.

00:18:07.269 --> 00:18:13.441
Like for the dom, submissive has all the power, not the dom, it's just a power play.

00:18:13.441 --> 00:18:16.323
You know they're playing, I'm in charge, but they're really not.

00:18:16.323 --> 00:18:19.306
But if they think they are, that's probably not the right dom for you.

00:18:19.306 --> 00:18:23.489
So just a little bit of warning, because it can be a little bit.

00:18:23.489 --> 00:18:33.037
You know, can be sometimes problematic, sadly, like most groups of people, but it's a really cool place for fat people to get a little taste of some fun, absolutely.

00:18:33.037 --> 00:18:36.207
Yeah, a little sidebar conversation.

00:18:36.299 --> 00:18:47.279
We went to a dungeon and saw like for the first time, all this stuff right, and it's a very controlled environment, very specific to hygiene and all the things.

00:18:47.279 --> 00:19:01.948
And I was talking about being in one of the saddles saddles where you like lean forward and you're like on all fours and that sort of thing and um, I was like, oh, wow, this one's really comfortable, because I was just like laying on it.

00:19:01.948 --> 00:19:02.250
I wasn't.

00:19:02.250 --> 00:19:34.807
You know, we were just looking at the dungeon, we were actually playing um, and they you know the guy who was running it said oh yeah, we make this specifically so that it's comfortable for larger bodies and that you can sit there for a while and feel comfortable while you're absorbing you know the hits that come from whatever and the spanking or those types of things and it's just like, wow, ok, like you've intentionally created an accommodation for my style of body, and like that tells me everything I need to know about kink.

00:19:34.807 --> 00:19:37.265
Hello, wow, bless them.

00:19:37.664 --> 00:19:39.088
Was that dungeon up in the Bay Area?

00:19:39.088 --> 00:19:39.369
Somewhere?

00:19:39.369 --> 00:19:45.961
It was in Sacramento, okay, cool, yeah, I'm telling you it's a very fat, friendly, very just everybody friendly community.

00:19:45.961 --> 00:19:49.655
So I always check to give them their props because it's pretty awesome.

00:19:49.655 --> 00:19:50.599
Yeah, absolutely.

00:19:50.599 --> 00:20:04.133
And also, if you're in the same relationship with the same person for 70 years, like we were talking about, it would be a good idea to just try some new stuff, because, whoa, yeah, and they're really, from what I've seen, um, very accommodating to newbies.

00:20:04.133 --> 00:20:05.923
You know like, oh, you want to learn about this.

00:20:05.923 --> 00:20:18.712
Like sure, let's teach you, you know and and here are the ways and here's some other alternatives, and and so, yeah, it definitely seems like a much more open, sexually and also accepting group.

00:20:19.034 --> 00:20:33.788
We talked to Reagan about how to handle yourself in an exam room with medical professionals, which you know, kind of went in tandem with that Dr Robert conversation, but very specific, on like, okay, they've told you you have a sinus infection and they prescribe weight loss.

00:20:33.788 --> 00:20:34.761
How do you handle that?

00:20:34.761 --> 00:20:37.471
You know, how do you state what you need to state to them?

00:20:37.471 --> 00:20:42.365
The clues and the tips that she gave are so helpful.

00:20:42.365 --> 00:20:55.906
So you know, if you are experiencing those issues, go back and listen to that episode and if you're an ally, go listen to that episode because you could help your fat friends that have to experience and endure this on a regular basis.

00:20:55.906 --> 00:21:00.542
I don't know a single fat person who hasn't had a traumatic experience with a doctor.

00:21:00.542 --> 00:21:02.306
Sadly, it's true.

00:21:02.707 --> 00:21:06.101
But yeah, thin friends, please could you watch out for us too?

00:21:06.101 --> 00:21:10.820
I think, specifically on that episode, we were talking about them looking out for us at holiday parties.

00:21:10.820 --> 00:21:20.244
If you see some bullshit going down, could you speak up please, because if we're the one that they're putting down, it's hard for us to jump in there and it's better if somebody else is on the outside going.

00:21:20.244 --> 00:21:21.730
Hey, that's bullshit, don't say that.

00:21:21.730 --> 00:21:29.202
Don't say that about my friend or my loved one, and pay attention if there's chairs for us to sit in, and if there's not, then maybe you go ask the hostess or host.

00:21:29.202 --> 00:21:32.685
Could you please find a chair without arms or whatever the person needs it's.

00:21:32.685 --> 00:21:42.896
I know it sounds stupid, but people trust thin people more than they trust fat people for some bullshit reason.

00:21:42.896 --> 00:21:43.981
But it's just the.

00:21:43.981 --> 00:21:45.145
It's just the truth right now.

00:21:45.145 --> 00:21:47.432
And, um, it's nice that someone else can jump in for us.

00:21:47.432 --> 00:21:49.208
It's not always us just trying to defend ourselves.

00:21:49.208 --> 00:21:54.566
So, yeah, that was a great episode and reagan always gives us good tactics for dealing with the shitheads at our holiday parties.

00:21:54.566 --> 00:22:09.407
Yeah, and just the work that she's doing for the medical community to re-educate and talk about all the things that keep the anti-fatness going in that culture and field.

00:22:09.407 --> 00:22:18.000
So it's exciting to see that she's you know field.

00:22:18.000 --> 00:22:20.463
So it's exciting to see that she's you know, gaining more opportunities to educate and share.

00:22:20.463 --> 00:22:21.065
So that was really cool.

00:22:21.085 --> 00:22:25.853
We had Grim on the gothic psychic doula fat liberationist.

00:22:25.853 --> 00:22:26.694
She does it all.

00:22:26.694 --> 00:22:28.162
She is just.

00:22:28.162 --> 00:22:30.588
I want to be Grim when I grow up.

00:22:30.588 --> 00:22:34.125
Hell, yeah, damn.

00:22:34.826 --> 00:22:49.695
And then we had our fat round table with other podcasting friends and I think we've got some people that are going to come back in 2025 and have a kind of another recap and decide with our predictions of what we want to have happen in 25.

00:22:49.695 --> 00:22:55.627
If they're going to end up coming to fruition yeah, ronald said he's very much interested in coming back on.

00:22:55.627 --> 00:22:57.807
And let's talk some more about Ozempic and all the-.

00:22:57.807 --> 00:23:01.748
Oh, yeah, all the Simigultu, whatever the hell they're called GLP-1s.

00:23:01.748 --> 00:23:03.772
Yeah, isn't it funny.

00:23:03.839 --> 00:23:12.088
I was just thinking about Reagan and the stuff about medical anti-fatness and the kink world how they have some things in common, like we need more accommodations.

00:23:12.088 --> 00:23:13.832
The kink world's ahead of the medical world.

00:23:13.832 --> 00:23:19.025
They're already making accommodations for us and I know I say this a lot, but we're 70% of the population.

00:23:19.025 --> 00:23:19.848
We are the majority.

00:23:19.848 --> 00:23:22.286
Could everybody start accommodating us please?

00:23:22.286 --> 00:23:26.125
Right, yeah, oh, that would be delightful.

00:23:26.125 --> 00:23:26.688
Yeah, yeah.

00:23:26.688 --> 00:23:38.391
But yeah, it was really fun that we had both hosts from Fat Infect and then we had Ronald on the show and his podcast is Wait For it with W-E-I-G-H.

00:23:38.391 --> 00:23:39.936
And yeah, it was a great talk.

00:23:39.936 --> 00:23:41.141
I can't wait for everybody to listen to it.

00:23:41.662 --> 00:23:43.425
Yeah, it was a great year.

00:23:43.425 --> 00:23:48.021
We did talk about, you know, social influencers and how things have changed.

00:23:48.021 --> 00:23:57.787
We talked a little bit about just the Bridgerton sex craze and fat bodies that they determined were fat bodies in that episode Worthy of being sexy.

00:23:57.787 --> 00:23:59.471
Yeah, yeah, exactly.

00:23:59.471 --> 00:24:02.781
And we also talked to the Full Figured Industry Awards.

00:24:02.781 --> 00:24:06.309
Yes, it was a great year.

00:24:06.309 --> 00:24:07.211
You were nominated again.

00:24:07.211 --> 00:24:07.752
Yeah, that was nice.

00:24:08.880 --> 00:24:15.538
You know one thing I forgot to mention about what happened the things that happened in 2024, you know one thing I forgot to mention about what happened the things that happened in 2024.

00:24:15.538 --> 00:24:16.380
We can't forget the Oprah live show.

00:24:16.380 --> 00:24:22.632
Oh yeah, with the fat activists and her apologizing, with her special Oprah apology.

00:24:22.632 --> 00:24:28.940
Really, it wasn't exactly what I would have loved to have heard, but she's making progress, you know.

00:24:28.940 --> 00:24:31.950
That's all you can do, I guess, is hope for everybody to make some more progress.

00:24:31.950 --> 00:24:34.625
But, yeah, I remember Katie Starino.

00:24:34.625 --> 00:24:49.012
She's a fat activist and she was on the show with them too and she was great and it seems like she's been educating and she was educating that she's no longer the CEO of Weight Watchers but the woman that was the CEO who was on the show.

00:24:49.012 --> 00:24:53.611
They got connected because Katie did a whole thing about Weight Watchers.

00:24:53.611 --> 00:24:57.669
Again, nothing's changed, it's the same, it's just you have to have different packaging.

00:24:57.729 --> 00:25:01.387
And then the Weight Watchers people, they kind of apologized as well.

00:25:01.387 --> 00:25:04.083
And then they did the live show and Oprah kind of apologized.

00:25:04.083 --> 00:25:06.588
And that was in May and that was a big thing.

00:25:06.588 --> 00:25:11.104
It wasn't perfect, but it was something, and I haven't followed up.

00:25:11.104 --> 00:25:14.830
Has Weight Watchers lived up to their statement that they made?

00:25:14.830 --> 00:25:16.394
I don't think so.

00:25:16.394 --> 00:25:16.775
I don't know.

00:25:16.775 --> 00:25:19.269
I can't say for sure, but I try really hard to ignore them.

00:25:19.269 --> 00:25:23.170
Yeah, I haven't heard anything that's like oh, hey, we would know.

00:25:23.170 --> 00:25:26.269
Yeah, they're making do on their promise to us.

00:25:26.269 --> 00:25:28.728
No, they're just prescribing Ozempic nowadays.

00:25:28.728 --> 00:25:29.961
So that's the thing.

00:25:30.061 --> 00:25:39.872
As soon as they started carrying this I saw the press release about them carrying and you know, share, selling the shots and stuff I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, here we go.

00:25:39.872 --> 00:25:45.066
You know people think it's the magic, whatever you want to call it, the magic thing to help you become thin.

00:25:45.066 --> 00:25:56.853
Yeah, but we know now that once you've been on it more than two years, yeah, it's not working that great because you can't stop taking it right.

00:25:56.853 --> 00:26:16.839
So if you ever stop taking it, then I'm assuming you're going to get your weight back Right and I think that probably has been the most influential thing of 2024 is these GLP ones, and I'm so sad that it's brought back diet culture Like we were making such good headway.

00:26:17.361 --> 00:26:28.240
We were really starting to have the conversation of what anti-fatness means and to have that come and just be explosive.

00:26:28.240 --> 00:26:35.558
I mean, people are dying for it, people are getting like permanently disabled for it.

00:26:35.558 --> 00:26:39.434
Um, when it's unnecessary, it it's.

00:26:39.434 --> 00:26:41.829
They don't have diabetes, they don't need that medication.

00:26:41.829 --> 00:26:44.517
You're using it off brand, which I understand.

00:26:44.517 --> 00:26:51.684
Lots of medications are used off brand certain things, but for weight loss specifically, I don't it.

00:26:51.684 --> 00:26:54.034
It shouldn't be packaged as a medical thing.

00:26:54.034 --> 00:26:55.038
It's too bad.

00:26:55.038 --> 00:27:07.936
This medication is being so villainized too, because it is an amazing drug for diabetics, which is whom they was created for, and it really does help them to reduce their insulin or stop taking insulin altogether and bring their A1Cs down.

00:27:07.936 --> 00:27:15.211
But then it got perverted by the celebrity culture, who all decided they were going to have ozetic parties to lose their last 10 pounds or whatever bullshit.

00:27:15.211 --> 00:27:20.249
Um, yeah, then the diabetic people couldn't get it and people were dying over that.

00:27:20.249 --> 00:27:23.314
It's like all for vanity, right it?

00:27:23.314 --> 00:27:26.748
Just that was a big bummer for 2024.

00:27:27.128 --> 00:27:27.450
Also.

00:27:27.450 --> 00:27:32.305
How about doesn't it kind of prove that it's really not within our, it's our genetic code, right?

00:27:32.305 --> 00:27:35.287
Like you can't, you can't, just you, I guess?

00:27:35.287 --> 00:27:43.953
You right, you can diet all you want and try to keep the weight off, but as soon as you stop doing that, we all know now that the weight's going to come back.

00:27:43.953 --> 00:27:51.640
It's like, isn't that kind of further proving that concept that, no, it's not within our ability to just change the shape of our bodies?

00:27:51.640 --> 00:27:52.259
Our bodies are.

00:27:52.259 --> 00:27:55.942
We have a genetic code that makes determines the size of our body, right?

00:27:55.942 --> 00:27:57.287
Isn't that more evidence of that?

00:27:57.287 --> 00:27:58.788
Oh, absolutely.

00:27:58.788 --> 00:28:03.557
But our culture is so contrarian to that entire process.

00:28:03.557 --> 00:28:07.048
It's just, it's like, well, how did trump get into office?

00:28:07.048 --> 00:28:10.857
You know, it's like every person can be like, look at the evidence here.

00:28:10.857 --> 00:28:13.890
You know, yeah, yeah, yeah, yucko.

00:28:14.530 --> 00:28:19.500
I was also very excited this year about the your Fat Friend documentary.

00:28:19.500 --> 00:28:22.970
That was rough.

00:28:22.970 --> 00:28:24.192
I mean, it's so beautiful.

00:28:24.192 --> 00:28:31.316
But I'm sure for everybody that's fat or have been fat since the third grade, like me, you can relate to a lot of the touch points in that movie.

00:28:31.316 --> 00:28:31.905
It's boy.

00:28:31.905 --> 00:28:35.030
I felt so seen and so sad.

00:28:35.030 --> 00:28:54.693
I watched it on my 42nd birthday and I just was like sobbing at certain points, because it was just so amazing to see someone else being so vulnerable, who looks like me, and have that story told and it was so personal.

00:28:54.974 --> 00:29:19.123
I think I expected when I went into that movie or that documentary that like I was going to be watching just you know, the professional side of her life and not the personal side, and she really opened the door to like the family dynamics and the comments that were made and it was so incredible to see her parents learn and some of them tried to adapt and change.

00:29:19.123 --> 00:29:32.749
Some of them didn't do so well with that but by the end of it you were like, well, there's progress to be made, there's things that are moving in the right direction and she, she's really, um, she's like my biggest hero, like I just fucking love her.

00:29:32.749 --> 00:29:48.836
It was very, uh, intense and yeah, her, all her things with her family definitely brings up all the old stuff that all of us probably dealt with all the microaggressions that we grew up with and having to dress like a professional when I was 10 because there was no clothes for me, all that stupid shit.

00:29:48.836 --> 00:30:03.376
And yeah, even when our parents are trying their hardest to do the best, there's some missteps, right for all of us and I know my mom didn't mean to hurt me in any way, but all the diets, you know which is what they do.

00:30:03.376 --> 00:30:09.667
Still, you know people, women or people in their 70s they don't feel like they're in control unless they're controlling their diet.

00:30:09.667 --> 00:30:27.435
So it's like I know that's how they've been acculturated and you know my mom never wanted to harm me but you know some of that did and I'm still working through the trauma and that movie really pointed that out.

00:30:27.435 --> 00:30:28.839
I was like, oh, hurt my heart, yeah, yeah, that's so needed to be shared.

00:30:28.839 --> 00:30:29.762
You know those stories aren't often told.

00:30:29.762 --> 00:31:04.018
And for her to be so vulnerable with that and talk about how the vitriol that she experiences, you know, like how people were trying to dox her and like coming after her just because she was speaking out about like hey, I'm a fat person and I deserve to live my life without harassment, and that she experienced that much more harassment just for saying that Like it reminds me a lot of the harassment that Regan Chastain used to receive and I think she still does People coming to her Ironman, to her Iron man races, where they're like, fatty, you can't finish Iron man, all that kind of shit.

00:31:04.018 --> 00:31:04.500
A lot of it.

00:31:04.500 --> 00:31:07.471
Similar happened to Aubrey.

00:31:07.592 --> 00:31:10.351
Have you listened to the maintenance phase of the Richard Simmons episodes?

00:31:10.351 --> 00:31:21.913
Yes, childhood coming back to me, right, I didn't realize so much stuff in his life was just, yeah, speaking of people who should never have children.

00:31:21.913 --> 00:31:24.346
His parents maybe were the two of those people.

00:31:24.346 --> 00:31:30.858
Yeah, and and just the trauma and yeah, it was a lot.

00:31:30.858 --> 00:31:45.545
I, you know, I think you see a lot of that just in general when people are so like I, you know, I want to be in control of all of this and I want to have you know the say it's amazing how off the rails you can get Boy.

00:31:45.545 --> 00:31:47.010
Did they go off the rails with him?

00:31:47.010 --> 00:31:53.148
And also, I think his queerness really had a lot of impact on a lot of that stuff and it was really.

00:31:53.148 --> 00:32:02.991
I mean, if you're queer and you think it's hard now, imagine what it was like in the 70s and 80s for Richard, who didn't really want anybody to know that he was queer and that's heartbreaking.

00:32:02.991 --> 00:32:05.963
Yeah, that he felt like he had to hide that, especially towards the end of his life.

00:32:05.963 --> 00:32:11.356
The hearing about what happened towards the end was like, oh, like that's just a sad way to go out.

00:32:11.356 --> 00:32:13.951
Yeah, you could tell he was a good human.

00:32:13.951 --> 00:32:22.851
He was just misdirected and some things about weight and like, like a lot of us.

00:32:22.871 --> 00:32:24.458
But, um, another good thing that happened this year is with michelle buteau.

00:32:24.458 --> 00:32:27.749
She's got a second season of, uh, survival of the survival of the fattest, survival of the fittest what is it fittest?

00:32:27.749 --> 00:32:30.074
Fittest, yeah, I want it to be.

00:32:30.074 --> 00:32:32.527
Should be, survival of the fattest, it should be.

00:32:32.527 --> 00:32:33.867
I know it's a great show.

00:32:33.867 --> 00:32:34.328
I love her.

00:32:34.328 --> 00:32:39.515
I'm sad that somewhere a bridget everett show is going to go away after their third season.

00:32:39.555 --> 00:32:48.252
But, yeah, excited for michelle buteau and and michelle was, uh, she just was the first, this is the first black female to sell out.

00:32:48.252 --> 00:32:54.148
Um, is it madison square garden or is it the radio city music hall, shit, either one.

00:32:54.148 --> 00:33:00.458
Wow, yeah, I don't remember, but she was like she just finished her special there and so I think it comes out next year.

00:33:00.458 --> 00:33:09.710
But, yeah, like, so incredible I I'm, I love everything that she is in and effort towards.

00:33:09.710 --> 00:33:17.099
She's just so clever and smart and funny and uh and gorgeous, yeah, she's so beautiful.

00:33:17.099 --> 00:33:23.369
Her comedy is very nuanced until you get to the punchline.

00:33:23.369 --> 00:33:25.757
That is like laugh out loud, laugh your ass off.

00:33:25.757 --> 00:33:27.808
Funny, yes, absolutely.

00:33:27.808 --> 00:33:30.273
Like she just builds a little step, step, step, bam.

00:33:30.273 --> 00:33:32.597
Oh, my god, I'm killing me.

00:33:32.597 --> 00:33:34.469
She's amazing.

00:33:34.528 --> 00:33:37.757
I'd have to wear a mini pad if I went to go see her in person, because I'm sure I would pee in my pants.

00:33:37.757 --> 00:33:52.548
Yeah, absolutely, just from the show, like there were so many moments where I was just like chuckling so hard I was like, okay, I should pause so I can go pee Exactly, that's my problem.

00:33:52.548 --> 00:33:59.814
I wish they made some of those undies that are supposed to help you when you pee a little bit larger for people with big booties, huge booties like mine.

00:33:59.814 --> 00:34:01.415
We need a wider gusset.

00:34:01.415 --> 00:34:04.959
Folks like come on, we're period panties, but in a wider gusset.

00:34:04.959 --> 00:34:07.561
Yeah, yeah, exactly all, the, all the panties.

00:34:07.561 --> 00:34:12.827
Just make them with a wider gusset for us, if people are size 12 or over, we need, we need a large, larger gusset, please.

00:34:12.827 --> 00:34:14.250
It just makes sense.

00:34:14.250 --> 00:34:20.400
You know, yeah, I don't want my shibinga, you know, falling off the side of my undies, exactly Most of the time I don't anyway.

00:34:20.400 --> 00:34:27.659
And we want the same fabrics and the same colors and styles as everybody else.

00:34:27.659 --> 00:34:30.833
Like, give us cute underwear with big gussets.

00:34:30.833 --> 00:34:32.117
I know you can do it.

00:34:33.164 --> 00:34:36.516
Besides, there's a couple other things I want to mention about 2024.

00:34:36.516 --> 00:35:09.268
No-transcript, and they both.

00:35:09.268 --> 00:35:15.594
Fat con philly already happened again this year and then fat con in seattle is going to happen again in january 31st 2025.

00:35:15.594 --> 00:35:16.617
I, I can't wait.

00:35:16.617 --> 00:35:19.588
Yeah, tell everybody what you're going to be doing there.

00:35:19.588 --> 00:35:26.992
I'm going to be giving a talk on hot sex for fat folks and I'm going to be demonstrating not, my test sounds weird.

00:35:26.992 --> 00:35:29.365
I'm going to be showing off some sex toys.

00:35:30.086 --> 00:35:33.655
Nice, when I used to do sex toy parties, people say, oh, hey, I heard you do sex parties.

00:35:33.655 --> 00:35:35.177
Oh, actually, no, I do sex toy parties, not sex parties.

00:35:35.177 --> 00:35:37.121
I mean, no, I do sex toy parties, not sex parties.

00:35:37.121 --> 00:35:43.195
I mean I could come to your sex party with my sex toys, but no, I don't do sex parties, right.

00:35:43.195 --> 00:35:57.221
But yeah, I'm gonna show off some, really some of these great products that we love and products that were designed for our bodies, like the um doggy style, plus size, doggy style strap made by sports sheets, and all the great toys that we've been discovering through womanizer and we vibe and and Satisfyer.

00:35:57.300 --> 00:36:17.195
And yeah, we're going to talk all about it and how to use it, how to have more fun in your sex life and how to expand your horizons in your sex life, because it does get tedious when you have sex with the same person for 20 years or more, right, no, and I love that you're doing that, but also that FatCon wants that kind of content, because this is our podcast.

00:36:17.195 --> 00:36:32.255
We talk about fat sex, we want everybody to have that conversation, and so, being in a venue where you can say this is normal, let's talk about all the things that we can have pure enjoyment about, that's the shit.

00:36:32.255 --> 00:36:33.277
100%.

00:36:33.277 --> 00:36:36.836
Yes, I think that's about all I can think of of that.

00:36:36.836 --> 00:36:37.481
I could thought.

00:36:37.481 --> 00:36:39.889
I know a lot of stuff happened last year, good and bad.

00:36:39.889 --> 00:36:42.505
Is there anything else that I missed that we should cover or talk about?

00:36:42.505 --> 00:36:50.528
No, I think you covered pretty much everything that I would say was big, like influential, yeah, for the year kind of stuff.

00:36:51.090 --> 00:36:53.715
Um, what are you thinking about for 2025?

00:36:53.715 --> 00:36:54.577
Like, what are you?

00:36:54.577 --> 00:36:56.811
What are you hoping for what?

00:36:56.811 --> 00:36:59.217
What do you want, like for your body?

00:36:59.217 --> 00:37:01.568
More, better clothes.

00:37:01.568 --> 00:37:03.996
Not that I'm a clothes horse, but man, it's really.

00:37:04.264 --> 00:37:05.547
It's thin pickings out there.

00:37:05.547 --> 00:37:07.713
I just need some better pants.

00:37:07.713 --> 00:37:09.766
Why is it so hard to find good pants?

00:37:09.766 --> 00:37:12.974
I mean, I get them from Catherine's a lot of times.

00:37:12.974 --> 00:37:16.148
I used to buy them from Lane Bryant, but Lane Bryant's been a big disappointment.

00:37:16.148 --> 00:37:26.715
The last couple of for me, katherine's is fine, but they just fall apart so easily and you know I'm rough on my pants, no doubt you know I'm a size 30, 28, 30 pant and I, you know I do.

00:37:26.715 --> 00:37:31.909
I work all day long in them, so I know it's tough, but gosh, can't they find something better?

00:37:31.909 --> 00:37:34.672
Yeah, I don't know.

00:37:34.672 --> 00:37:40.601
That's something we can actually like fit different styles of fat bodies.

00:37:40.601 --> 00:37:43.472
Thank you, I just don't get it.

00:37:43.472 --> 00:37:46.719
It's like y'all you know that there's different types.

00:37:46.719 --> 00:37:48.231
Like what are we doing here?

00:37:48.231 --> 00:37:50.909
Yeah, and the quality, like you said.

00:37:50.909 --> 00:37:52.331
Just, it's a.

00:37:52.331 --> 00:37:57.934
I have to pay two times the amount for it and then it's obliterated in half the time.

00:37:57.934 --> 00:38:02.472
Fat tax yeah, exactly times the amount for it and then it's obliterated in half the time.

00:38:02.472 --> 00:38:02.893
Fat tax yeah, exactly.

00:38:02.914 --> 00:38:24.750
I've been researching, you know, um, t-shirts to make, because I want to have like a merchant merch store selling our t-shirts and stuff like my shirt that says glorifying obesity, yeah, and um, it's so hard to find shirts over 7x and you know, of course there's extra small and small and medium and large and extra large, but then once you get to 1x, you people, mostly a lot of these brands stop at 3X and they say that they're inclusive.

00:38:24.750 --> 00:38:27.914
But I want to have like 7, 8, 10, 11, 12.

00:38:27.914 --> 00:38:29.472
Like, I want to have whatever size people need.

00:38:29.472 --> 00:38:33.996
But once you get, most of the time, if you want to buy a 6X, you're going to have the male cut.

00:38:33.996 --> 00:38:40.273
You're going to get the male cut, you're going to get the male shoulders, the boxiness you know.

00:38:40.273 --> 00:38:40.855
And then, um, I want a v-neck.

00:38:40.855 --> 00:38:42.059
I don't know about you, but I can't stand a crew neck.

00:38:42.059 --> 00:38:42.400
Yeah, that's it.

00:38:42.422 --> 00:38:57.907
Like, I want the variety, I want the baseball tee, I want the v-neck, I want the tank top, I want the same fucking options that every other person in the united states, in the world to get and not have to fucking pay double the amount.

00:38:57.907 --> 00:39:03.579
That sounds like the first sentence of my new website, which is I just want all the things that all the thins have.

00:39:03.579 --> 00:39:06.889
Is that that difficult, since we are the fucking majority?

00:39:06.889 --> 00:39:08.032
But, yeah, just like.

00:39:08.032 --> 00:39:09.275
Why does that be so difficult?

00:39:09.275 --> 00:39:11.550
And also, then they're like there is the fat tax.

00:39:11.590 --> 00:39:20.027
So when I try to buy shirts that are 7x, it's going to be double the price of that, but 2x and you know which is probably double the price of the extra small.

00:39:20.027 --> 00:39:27.630
It's so annoying and it's the first shit to go when you go to the store, like people go to the brick and mortar and buy blah, blah, blah.

00:39:27.630 --> 00:39:29.335
Okay, well, they carry 3x.

00:39:29.335 --> 00:39:30.096
Guess what?

00:39:30.096 --> 00:39:31.427
3x is the first thing.

00:39:31.427 --> 00:39:32.228
That's fucking gone.

00:39:32.228 --> 00:39:34.614
Yep, but we've got 40 extra smalls.

00:39:34.614 --> 00:39:38.579
You want to just like stitch them together like what the fuck?

00:39:38.579 --> 00:39:44.927
Oh, and people have done I've even done that we've switched two things together to make especially costumes like oh, costumes.

00:39:44.927 --> 00:39:47.635
A whole other thing it's really hard to get plus size costumes above a 3x.

00:39:47.635 --> 00:39:50.753
Yes, that fit in any kind of way.

00:39:50.753 --> 00:39:52.336
That covers like your ass.

00:39:53.539 --> 00:39:56.405
And not not all fat girls have big boobs, right?

00:39:56.405 --> 00:39:57.947
Not not all fat girls have big butts.

00:39:57.947 --> 00:39:58.827
Some of us fat girls have big butts.

00:39:58.827 --> 00:40:00.489
Some of us have big tummies, some of us don't.

00:40:00.489 --> 00:40:01.969
Some of us have big butts and flat tummies.

00:40:01.969 --> 00:40:10.536
We're all sizes and please, please, give that some consideration, because I know people who have smaller butts.

00:40:10.536 --> 00:40:16.380
They buy a bra and it's like the boob cups are sticking out 10 miles and they're like, yeah, I'm filling a B cup in here.

00:40:16.380 --> 00:40:17.920
That sucks, it's not fair.

00:40:17.920 --> 00:40:21.807
Yeah, I agree, bras are another whole thing.

00:40:21.807 --> 00:40:22.889
Shit, that's bad.

00:40:22.889 --> 00:40:24.695
Yeah, the bras.

00:40:24.695 --> 00:40:27.791
And there's also foundations people trying to find a foundation for their wedding dresses.

00:40:27.791 --> 00:40:38.579
Oh, I wish somebody would get into that industry and just make it so that people who get married and they want to wear a dress can and not feel like they they're falling out of it or whatever.

00:40:38.579 --> 00:40:39.280
It's kind of a mess.

00:40:39.320 --> 00:40:40.043
But what about you, murph?

00:40:40.043 --> 00:40:41.505
What do you want for yourself in 2025?

00:40:41.505 --> 00:40:52.340
So, um, I'm finishing, or I'm in the middle of my electrolysis um journey, oh, yeah, yeah.

00:40:52.340 --> 00:41:03.628
So I'm, I'm hopeful that, um, I will have a smooth, uh, chin and neck neck by the end of 2025, you know, without having to go in every month.

00:41:03.628 --> 00:41:07.838
At least, you know, be at like a quarterly type basis or something like that.

00:41:07.838 --> 00:41:11.635
So, murph, why don't you tell everybody that you have PCOS and all the hair stuff?

00:41:11.635 --> 00:41:35.012
Yeah, so I have polycystic ovarian syndrome, which is PCOS, and endometriosis, and polycystic ovarian syndrome is basically where you get cysts on your ovaries, but it's usually caused because there's a hormonal imbalance and so I have a lot more testosterone than the average female does.

00:41:35.353 --> 00:42:14.527
So, um, I produce like chin hair and like like a beard, like, um, guys do, and so, um, and there's all kinds of other things that go with that, but that's one of the most annoying um, because it's it's painful, like I get um ingrown hairs there and you have to shave all the time or pluck, and you're not supposed to pluck, and so I had always been interested in electrolysis but basically I didn't have the money and so I've put it off and put it off and put it off, and my husband actually found a person to get his ears done because he was like I don't want to be one of those old men with the hair, you know, coming out like.

00:42:14.527 --> 00:42:21.657
So he started doing it and I started going to them because they're not far away and, um, it's been really great.

00:42:21.657 --> 00:42:26.773
So I'm hoping to have yeah, I'm hoping to have smooth chin, chin and neck.

00:42:28.038 --> 00:42:32.489
One of the things that go along with pcos is insulin resistance, pcos.

00:42:32.489 --> 00:42:34.632
Pcos makes people fat.

00:42:34.632 --> 00:42:37.858
Being fat doesn't cause PCOS.

00:42:37.858 --> 00:42:41.148
Just want to clarify people because there's a lot of misinformation out there.

00:42:41.148 --> 00:42:47.054
But when you have PCOS, you're likely to have some weight gain because of the fucking hormonal imbalance.

00:42:47.054 --> 00:42:52.094
It's not the other way around, which is why I try to tell people if you want to troll fat people, how about first you go?

00:42:52.094 --> 00:42:53.987
Hey, I wonder if that person has a disease.

00:42:53.987 --> 00:42:57.012
I wonder if that person has some kind of disorder, I wonder why that person's fat.

00:42:57.012 --> 00:42:59.277
It's not just because we're sitting around eating fucking bonbons.

00:42:59.277 --> 00:43:02.710
Okay, a lot of times there's other things that create our fatness.

00:43:02.710 --> 00:43:04.476
So chill out, brad.

00:43:05.125 --> 00:43:15.713
Yeah, it makes me think of that quote in the your Fat Friend film where Aubrey basically says you shouldn't look at the fat people and think that they're a failure.

00:43:15.713 --> 00:43:24.119
You should be looking at the fat people and being like I can't even imagine the amount of trauma that individual has experienced trying to lose weight.

00:43:24.119 --> 00:43:31.346
Because there's not a single fat person that you've met that hasn't done some sort of diet to try to change their body.

00:43:31.346 --> 00:43:37.860
Because we're constantly told that our bodies need to be eradicated Amen, sister, that our bodies need to be eradicated.

00:43:37.860 --> 00:43:38.400
Amen, sister.

00:43:38.400 --> 00:43:45.728
So I just that's one of the things that you know.

00:43:45.728 --> 00:43:53.467
It's been something that's bothered me basically my entire since puberty life and it's something that you know I'm hoping that I'll get some relief from.

00:43:54.431 --> 00:44:00.289
I do too, and as an electrologist, griff and I are not in the same city, otherwise I would be treating her extra hair.

00:44:00.289 --> 00:44:01.112
I always say your extra hair.

00:44:01.112 --> 00:44:03.405
I'm in the business of removing people's extra hair.

00:44:03.405 --> 00:44:12.813
I don't care where it is If it's not, as long as it's not inside of your nose or inside of your ear canal, I can remove it, and I do mean everywhere and I do treat a lot of people in all kinds of different places.

00:44:12.813 --> 00:44:27.644
But a lot of my clients are women with PCOS, people who are born assigned female at birth and then, especially if they want to transition, that can get tricky, but it's tricky for everybody who has extra facial hair, extra hair anywhere.

00:44:27.644 --> 00:44:30.574
And the cool thing about electrology is it's permanent.

00:44:30.574 --> 00:44:36.668
The bad thing about electrology is it's expensive and here in the Bay Area we don't have enough electrologists so I'm booked out six months.

00:44:36.708 --> 00:44:42.438
But it's a very important part of our industry is that we're here to help out people with PCOS because it's really common.

00:44:42.438 --> 00:44:49.041
And it seems to be really common in the Black community because I notice all my Black clients that are female all have PCOS.

00:44:49.041 --> 00:44:53.786
I don't know why, but that sucks.

00:44:53.786 --> 00:44:55.509
It's a very prevalent issue.

00:44:55.509 --> 00:44:56.891
That hasn't really.

00:44:56.891 --> 00:45:04.780
You know, we've talked a little bit about this last year or this year, about how you know the industry doesn't examine women.

00:45:04.780 --> 00:45:21.447
You know, like we are uterus and have those experiences and just are like well, I guess this is normal, not, hey?

00:45:21.447 --> 00:45:23.715
Maybe that should be studied, because maybe that's not normal.

00:45:23.715 --> 00:45:40.619
And the cool thing is sort of the tip of the iceberg, but I'm starting to hear women who are getting reimbursed for the astrology, that have PCOS, like people who are transitioning, because that is, you know, it's basically their diagnosis is gender dysphoria.

00:45:40.619 --> 00:45:43.432
There's other ones too, but that's the main one.

00:45:43.432 --> 00:45:58.891
And then people who have PCOS also have gender dysphoria in a way, but they're being reimbursed in some of the cities now and I'm excited to see if we can get that to happen everywhere, because my clients are coming to see me, sometimes two years, and it's a lot of money and a lot of time.

00:45:58.891 --> 00:46:02.514
Time is money and I would love for everybody to be able to get reimbursed.

00:46:02.514 --> 00:46:05.929
It's just, it's only fair, absolutely amazing.

00:46:05.929 --> 00:46:07.094
Yeah, very cool.

00:46:07.768 --> 00:46:25.090
The other thing that I'm really interested in in 2025 is spending some time getting a bit more adventurous sexually with my body, like going to the BDSM class, learning about Shibari and trying it out.

00:46:25.090 --> 00:46:29.199
Potentially, you know, having other partners.

00:46:29.199 --> 00:46:35.057
Like there's, there's a lot there that I really kind of want to just look into and explore.

00:46:35.057 --> 00:46:36.929
Hell, yeah, that's the right attitude, merv.

00:46:36.929 --> 00:46:39.869
I mean, why not try everything once and again?

00:46:39.869 --> 00:46:43.284
As long as everybody's consenting, you're leaving animals and kids out of it.

00:46:43.284 --> 00:46:45.090
Get down with your bad self.

00:46:45.090 --> 00:46:52.027
There's no wrong way to do it, really, as long as everybody's consenting, and I think, why the hell not try at all?

00:46:52.027 --> 00:46:55.630
Right, I mean, I want to try everything too, all of it.

00:46:55.989 --> 00:47:00.954
I'm greedy, and that's what makes you have the best sex life is when you get very greedy and you make it all about you.

00:47:00.954 --> 00:47:05.277
Yes, the greeter you get, the more fun you have Both of your partners and everybody else.

00:47:05.277 --> 00:47:09.340
Both you and your partner will have much more fun if you get greedy about your own pleasure.

00:47:09.340 --> 00:47:11.880
That makes me so happy when women tell me they're doing that.

00:47:11.880 --> 00:47:17.293
Men too, but mostly women, mostly women, yeah, yeah.

00:47:17.293 --> 00:47:18.635
So that's what I'm looking forward to.

00:47:19.865 --> 00:47:20.831
Sounds like a good year.

00:47:20.831 --> 00:47:22.271
Let's make this a good year for sure.

00:47:22.271 --> 00:47:27.717
I'm excited to have a lot more episodes next year and all kinds of great topics and guest speakers.

00:47:27.717 --> 00:47:35.056
And, yeah, if you can think of anything that you'd like us to talk about, please email us at bigsexychatpod at gmailcom.

00:47:35.056 --> 00:47:35.978
And what else?

00:47:35.978 --> 00:47:50.648
Murph, like, subscribe, share, share, give us a review, um, but definitely tell your friends because, um, and tell your skinny friends, like, have a conversation about how this could be helpful to the fat community.

00:47:50.648 --> 00:48:10.711
Just understanding the plight of the fat person as a skinny person, yeah, and let's let the world know that you get to have hot sex too, and fat people are sexual beings as well, and we all deserve pleasure and all of our bodies are capable of pleasure, and where there's a will, there's a way.

00:48:10.711 --> 00:48:13.445
Exactly, all right.

00:48:13.445 --> 00:48:15.608
Well, see you later, alligator, after a while.

00:48:15.608 --> 00:48:16.291
Crocodile.